Sagepaper

I sympathize with Z's attachment to belongings. I grew to an age when it was no longer possible for me to keep everything. I was mostly limited to the top-drawer of my dresser for things that were too important to let go. My choice of items would have made little sense to most people. For example, I kept a scrap of leather from some stranger's roller skate that I found in a parking lot. It was important because of its personality. Somehow, it belonged with me, or I would not have noticed it "calling out" to me.

To me, everything seems to have its own spirit and personality. Some things resonate strongly with me, others do not. When it is time for an object and me to part ways, I often spend a little time communing with it, sort of "talking" with it. I can usually keep from hurting its feelings that way. In fact, I sometimes let go something I like because it seems anxious to leave. In that case, the farewell communion is more for my benefit than for the object's.

Perhaps allowing Z some ritual time with things he is sorting would help. It takes longer, but in the end there is greater peace of spirit, and less anger at others. Disregard all of this, of course, if it is incompatible with your family's beliefs. As an aside, I do not believe my view of objects constitutes idolatry. I don't worship things, but I respect them.